Boxes, Bitchiness, and Being Yourself

There is a reason you should let theoretical physicists buy you birthday presents, because whatever box they give you, the contents will not be disappointing.
Think about it. In biology, what could be in a box? A plant. Possibly a skull. In the philosophical end of physics and maths, what could be in a box? Dead/Alive cats! Anti-entropy caused by a small demon with a lever! Infinity! A new dimension! Your future self! A menagerie of impossibility. I wasn't kidding, by the way, about the little Lucifer with a taste for categorisation - look up "Maxwell's Demon".
On another topic entirely, whoever came up with the frankly bizarre idea that being oneself was in any way a good philosophy? Being yourself is boring. Being yourself allows no form of healthy escapism. I'm acting now, in writing in a confident and self-assured manner, and frankly it's one of the best feelings there is. Artifice and make-believe are in no way weaknesses. To live in a world where actors are idolised but being 'fake' is frowned upon is contradictory and incredibly confusing. Surprisingly changing a part of yourself and putting on a mask is not a way of giving in to others. It's about self-empowerment, doing something for your own self-esteem - and while we're at it, you can write that down as my argument for make-up and 'sluttish' clothing. Oh, and I should mention that in my experience the people who most commonly use the "I'm just being myself/keeping it real" are the most obnoxious. If you have a flaw, or an issue with yourself, DON'T accept it. Try to change it, and if you can't, THEN accept it. End of lecture.
On the subject of 'keeping it real', I think this is a trait that perfectly pairs itself with sniping and gossip. I long for the sweet taste of repression, for a society where people have negative opinions and don't voice them. Insulting someone seems to have become a slightly sinful indulgence to share with friends - a cold desert in the truest sense of the phrase. A bitchy blancmange. Une glace glaciale. The inherent stoicism of the British is probably incredibly unhealthy, but by God it's OURS. Keep it that way.